Mystic women

One of my favourite chapters in the Quran is Surah Al Azhab which clarifies that our ranking with God is based on piety, not gender. Allah addresses men and women in the same breath: "O believing men and women, obedient, truthful, patient, humble, charitable and fasting men and women...."

According to Islam, the creation of Eve was not an afterthought; it was part of the primordial design of Creation. In the Quran, God says: "And everything we have created in pairs" (51:49). The Quran does not blame Eve for tempting Adam to eat the forbidden fruit; it holds Satan responsible for leading them both into sin.

Leadership roles
In the early days of Islam, Muslim women enjoyed leadership and community-building roles. Though cultural influences later corrupted the understanding of their rights, women continued to excel in religious science and there were several scholars of note. A quarter of the Hadith or the Prophet's sayings that form the corpus of Muslim faith, were gleaned from women. Interestingly, while Islamic history acknowledges instances of men fabricating Hadith, no woman was ever accused of this. Their intellectual integrity in conveying religious truth has never been in doubt. Women jurists passed fatwas or religious injunctions and these were respected even if they were in contravention of male opinion.

As spiritual masters and exemplars of Islamic piety, Muslim women often made their mark. There were any number of women scholars, poets, mystics, ascetics and founders of Sufi sects. They were leaders in their own right, often surpassing men in their understanding of the Quran and Islamic doctrine. Sulami, a 10th century Iranian scholar, compiled a rare study of 80 women Sufis.

Divine love
Many theologians refer to the Prophet's daughter Fatima, as the head of the Sufi order. A striking aspect of women Sufis is their intimate relationship with God and complete surrender to Him. Sufis credit Rabia Basri, eighth century mystic, with initiating the philosophy of Divine Love. She said that God be loved for His sake alone and not for reward of heaven or fear of hell.

Other women mystics include Umm Haram whose tomb is in Cyprus, Rabia bint Ismail and Muadha al Adaiyya of Syria, Nafisa of Mecca, Zainab and Ishi Nili of Persia and Fatima of Nishapur who lived in Mecca.

Ibn al Arabi, one of the greatest Sufi masters of all time, wrote that two women mystics, Shams of Marchena and Fatima of Cordova, had a great influence on him. About Fatima, he wrote: "I was her disciple...for several years.... She once told me 'I take joy in Him Who has turned to me and made me one of His Friends, using me for His own purposes'."

Bayazid Bistami, ninth century mystic, described Fatima of Nishapur as his teacher and would refer to her as an evolved soul. Dhun Nun, the Egyptian Sufi master, also acknowledged her scholarship and piety. When someone asked Dhun Nun who was the highest among Sufis, he replied: "A lady in Mecca, called Fatima Nishapuri, whose discourses bring out the essence of the Quran."

Fatima is said to have counselled him: "In all your actions, watch that you act with sincerity and in opposition to your lower self. Whoever doesn't have God in his consciousness is erring and in delusion, whatever language he speaks, whatever company he keeps. Whoever holds God's company, never speaks except with sincerity and assiduously adheres to a humble reserve and earnest devotion in his conduct."

Scholarship and piety
Women mystics either rejoiced or wept in devotion. Sha'wana, a Persian seeker would weep. She would say: "The eyes, prevented from beholding the Beloved, and yet desirous of looking at Him, cannot be fit for that vision without weeping." People would flock to hear her songs and discourses.

Many would seek out Sayyida Nafisa, a ninth century Egyptian known for her scholarship and piety, for her blessings. Several religious scholars, including Imam Shafai, founder of one of the four schools of Islamic jurisprudence, attended Nafisa's discourses and discussed matters of religious law with her. Before he died in 820 AD, he expressed his wish that Nafisa conduct his funeral prayer. But constant fasting had rendered Nafisa too weak to travel so Imam Shafai's body was taken to her in deference to his wish.

Despite the outward male and female form, there is no place for 'i' within Sufism; all that exists is 'Thou', the One Divine Reality.

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To dad, with love!

To celebrate my promotion and a hefty salary hike, I took my father to an expensive pen shop and offered him one of his choice. He tried several pens with enthusiasm, always scribbling something on the sheet of paper provided and finally made his choice. I noticed that he had written the same words with every pen – RYP. Intrigued, I asked him what it meant. He hesitated at first and then told me what it stood for – Remember You're Poor.

Life had been difficult in postpartition Punjab. My father's family members were refugees who had left their home and belongings in Pakistan and fled to India. Daddy was young then, about 17. He got admission into the medical college at Amritsar, and joined eagerly. Money was difficult to come by. My grandfather, already reeling from the tremors of Partition, had to fund the setting up of a new home in a new city, support an ailing wife, educate his two school-going children and also provide for my father's medical college and hostel expenses.

Throughout his medical college days, Daddy was acutely aware of his father's financial situation and of the strain he was undergoing to fund his son's medical education. "Our sacrifices will make our son's life," my grandfather would often say. This sentiment always remained the inspiration behind my father's efforts and kept his feet firmly on the ground.

While studying, when the rest of his roommates were sound asleep, he would write RYP in the corner of his book. Remember You're Poor. This pithy abbreviation would extend in my father's mind to — "Remember you cannot afford to fail. Remember your father cannot pay for another extra semester, in case you have to repeat it." This spurred him on to put in more hours and study with greater zeal. The result was that he breezed through medical college with flying colours.

Bored of the mundane hostel food, when Daddy was tempted to join his friends for a tandoori chicken and matka kulfi at the nearby dhaba, he would remind himself – RYP. "You cannot afford to waste your father's precious money just for a moment of pleasure." It was the same when it came to movies or cigarettes or any such "luxuries". RYP kept Daddy grounded in reality and away from what then seemed like mindless extravagance.

Being a proud Punjabi, he never let his friends have a whiff of his financial state. Friends, who often borrowed his notes, would ask him what RYP stood for, but he would just laugh.

On becoming a doctor, Daddy joined a renowned hospital where he had an illustrious career. The discipline he had cultivated during his college days held him in good stead during his professional life. Even then he did not forget RYP. He still scribbled it every now and then. It made him humble, kind and sensitive to those around him. His colleagues and patients loved him.

Daddy was honoured several times for his upright and principled views and his commitment to the healing profession. He had become used to felicitations. However, when on his 75th birthday, we all got together to honour him with a plaque, he had tears in his eyes while accepting it, for it had nothing but three letters inscribed on it in gold: RYP.

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Return to innocence

Live from the heart; with an open heart, you can feel things as they are without the burden of past conditioning, writes Paula Horan.

Happiness is something we all unconsciously seek and more so when times get tough. Ironically, I have discovered, after many years of trial and error, that happiness is not the ideal objective. Life is fraught with ups and downs, even in the best of times. There will always be periods of happiness and periods of pain, comfort and discomfort. Thus the equanimity which fosters contentment is perhaps a wiser aspiration which when pursued, requires us to wake up to who we are, minus the veil of ego.

It is eminently more practical, to get in touch with and anchor ones attention with the true self — the awareness within us which is unaffected by life's ups and downs — than to try and "fix" the mind and make it happy. Fixes are always only temporary. It behoves us to discover the 'beingness' that we are, which rests in a perfect state of equanimity, no matter what outer circumstances may be; whether they are good or bad.

Shed your ego
It is ultimately who we are, minus ego identification. This presence is always with us, for it is our essential nature, yet while we are identified with a busy mind, we fail to notice it. A certain shedding of mental burdens has to happen so that it can be felt and directly experienced. The most direct way to do this is to shed the burdened one with all of its various masks. For this to occur, the illusory experiencer (ego) has to be unveiled.

From this perspective, the problems and challenges of everyday life take on a whole new meaning. All at once, nothing changes and yet everything changes. We cease to take life so personally because we realise there is no "personal" self to begin with. Instead, we begin to perceive the vastness of who we are: wholly indefinable, wholly unknowable.

As we begin to feel and experience this vastness, it is clear that we can never know with the intellect the unlimited spaciousness of That. You begin to notice what quantum physics has made very clear, that there is only one vast continuum of energy. There are no real boundaries between us. Even the body's sack of skin, which seems to set us apart and separate us from other similar bodies, is ultimately a formless vibrating frequency of energy when viewed with a subatomic microscope.

Ignore past conditioning
As we begin to peek through the boundaries of the conceptual mind, our previous comfort zone, bound by our encyclopaedic memory of the past, with continued noticing, loses its hypnotic quality. The freshness of living a true present, unaided by past programming, gradually becomes more appealing.

To remove the veil of ego is not easy. All of samsara and its fantasies beckon us to remain complacent and to settle for far less. It requires fortitude and a kind of fierceness which is willing to surrender again and again to the will of the heart and cut through the slothful meandering mind, to make it through the mire of conditioned thought. Ultimately, an intense degree of vigilance, a willingness to stay open and present with what is, is necessary to regain our sanity. No less than a fierce sort of innocence is needed to cut through the bewilderment of an ego identified with what isn't really so.

Live from the heart
What is called for now, is a return to innocence, an innocence which must be intensely present with what is. Fierce energy keeps us in the present. The fierceness is not to protect our innocence, for it needs no protection, but to make it come alive, to fuel an open heart. Contrary to what we normally think, true strength lies in the vulnerability of an open heart; not in a heart which is closed. With an open heart, we can feel things as they are without the burden of past conditioning.

When we are fully present in our heart, we cannot be fooled. Unlike the ego-automatic mind which can easily be conned because it cannot feel; it can only think dualistically. The heart can easily tune in with the hearts of others and feel their motivation and their real need. When we can feel the motivation behind others' actions, which are often, fear based, we are less likely to fall prey to the same fear ourselves. Instead, we can choose to react in a loving way which often disarms fear, or if needed, we can use tough love which can also produce the desired effect. Either way, a return to innocence enables us to circumnavigate the illusory ego's clever roadblocks and live from the heart.

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Poetry in stone

 Dance is like mobile sculpture, while sculptures are frozen dance," says dance historian Sunil Kothari. He is talking about the synergy between the classical dance form of Odissi and  sculptures at the Konark Temple in Orissa.

Celebrating heritage
An annual celebration of this synergy is the Konark Dance Festival in which artistes converge here to pay tribute to the rich cultural heritage that has been handed down from one generation to the next.

Having performed here six times, Odissi artiste Madhavi Mudgal admits that the experience each time has been an extremely energising one. "In the realm of spirit, dance, too, is a form of religion and I would like to believe that dance is my religion; to me it's a form of divine worship." And what could be a more fitting venue than the precincts of the very temple at Konark, where, reportedly, dancing figures sculpted in stone reflect the synergy of Shaivite and Vaishnavaite traditions, enriching both art and faith.

The 13th century Konark temple, located not far from the sea, is renowned for the profusion of exquisite and intricate sculptural work. Dedicated to the Sun God, it is designed in the form of a chariot drawn by seven carved horses. The plinth of the natya mandapa located in its precinct is replete with sculptures depicting nayakas or dancers in various poses, inspiring artistes over the years.

Temple dance
"Odissi essentially evolved as a temple dance form. Dance was seen as a way to achieve union with God and, therefore, was part of temple ritual. No puja was complete without a dance offering as it would prove to be unfruitful without it. Dance represented prakriti, the female principle — that's to be combined with purusha in order for creation to happen," says Mudgal.

It was the maharis and gotipuas who gave dance performances in early times. Maharis or devadasis were dedicated by their parents to temples. Over time, with the growing influence of the Vaishnav tradition, the presence of rajas who declared themselves as incarnations of God, even Lord Jagannath, saw the the maharis performing in royal courts and hence they came to be known as nartakis.

Since young girls were discouraged from taking to dance, the maharis began to train young boys and they played both male and female roles, and often portrayed Radha and Krishna. These boy performers came to be known as gotipuas. Kelucharan Mohapatra belonged to the gotipua tradition.

The rich dance heritage inspired sculptors to "freeze" movements in stone. "When you see the dance postures there, you realise how the two — dancer and the sculptor were interdependent. Both of them shared a common language, common aesthetic principles and a kinetic language that explains body movements," says Kothari.

In Jain caves in the region, the dancer is shown performing with musicians seated around, says Mudgal. Each religious wave is said to have influenced dance — from Buddhism, Shakta and Shaiva to the cult of Jagannath.

Odissi manual
The Konark Sun Temple is virtually a manual of Odissi which helped artistes to revive the tradition after long years of neglect. "The dance per se did not have any notations, so the sculptures gave guidelines," says Kothari. Odissi exponents like Mahapatra would often take their students to this temple to study the form.

Inspiring Sun
Also adding to the performers' delight is the sun connection. The temple architecture includes three images of the Sun God, positioned to catch the rays of the sun at dawn, noon and sunset. Also, earlier, when the main sanctum sanctorum of the temple used to be open, you could see the sun's rays move across its walls, circumambulating it through the day. "The sun takes on a new meaning for an artiste. Surya is about creative energy, the cycle of day and night, the presence around which everything else moves," says Mudgal. 

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Praying can make you more forgiving

A person who prays for someone else makes them more forgiving, at least towards the person they are praying for, says a new study.

The research suggests that the person doing the praying feels increased levels of forgiveness toward the person being prayed for. And forgiveness, as the researchers note, is a vital element in maintaining close relationships. To reach this conclusion, Florida State University psychologist Nathaniel Lambert and colleagues conducted two experiments.

In the first, they had a group of men and women pray one single prayer for their romantic partner's well being. Others the experimental controlsthey simply described their partner, speaking into a tape recorder. Then they measured forgiveness. The scientists defined forgiveness as the diminishing of the initial negative feelings that arise when you've been wronged.

Their results showed that those who had prayed for their partner harboured fewer vengeful thoughts and emotions. They were more ready to forgive and move on. In a second study, the researchers had a group of men and women pray for a close friend every day for four weeks. Others simply reflected on the relationship, thinking positive thoughts but not praying for their friend's well-being. They also added another dimension. They used a scale to measure selfless concern for others not any particular person but other people generally. They speculated that prayer would increase selfless concern, which in turn would boost forgiveness and that's just what they found.

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Tuning in to the rhythm of life

We are not here on earth to struggle for a satisfying existence, or just exist aimlessly to the whims of our destiny. The Vedic view is that cessation of all misery is the purpose of human birth.

This can be achieved only through complete liberation of our consciousness. Good and evil, happiness and misery only exist in the mind of the observer. The conditioning of the mind is dictated by the manner in which we live. No one on earth can live a self-indulgent, indiscipline and wanton life and hope that this lifestyle will not affect his state of mind, for it would impact all his perceptions and circumstances.

Even our subsequent departure from this world would not alleviate our distress, because the cycle of birth and death is endless. Only Self-knowledge can free us from miseries. Self-knowledge can be achieved by living right. According to the Vedas, there are four values that are to be cultivated by any individual for living right. That is, there are four main purposes to human life. They are: Moral perfection, worldly attainment, fulfilment of legitimate desires and liberation. The first three values have meaning only when they are aimed at the fourth one. Only when the major aim is liberation, can an individual remain centred while following the other three tenets, else he may tend to become arrogant, greedy, power-hungry and immoral.

We live a life of moral perfection when we live in tune with our real Self, thereby always being in tune with the rhythm of life. We discover how to function in an optimum manner, and have the full support of Providence to evolve because Nature is always inclined towards progression. This is also known as 'the righteous way to live'. All our behaviours then become constructive, life enhancing and appropriate.

When we have a harmonious relationship with the Universe, it provides for all our needs. Whatever is required to make our lives satisfying, unfolds spontaneously. We are always in the flow of harmonious relationships and supportive circumstances. But we should also cultivate the faith that whatever is showing up is for our highest good. Impatience does not have spiritual virtue. With unshakeable faith in God, we should be joyous and enthusiastic always.

When our life-enhancing, legitimate desires are fulfilled, life is fulfilling, enjoyable and we can devote ourselves to higher learning and practice. As spiritual beings we have this ability to have our desires fulfilled by gentle intention. We do not have to apply great effort or struggle to have them fulfilled. As our awareness increases we are naturally in a state of fulfilment. We only need to acknowledge our desires and have complete faith that they will be soon fulfilled.

As spiritual beings we cannot be satisfied only living a life of contentment, worldly attainment and having our desires fulfilled. Without spiritual unfolding of our consciousness, we would always remain disgruntled and despite the fulfillment of the first three ideals, we would still be prone to getting waylaid. The first three practices make our lives satisfying so we can devote ourselves to the fourth and most important ideal. All four resolutions are interrelated and work in conjunction. We can demonstrate commitment to spiritual practice by making it the focal point of our lives. All actions and thoughts should be conducted from that platform. As we keep progressing on our path with full dedication, we are forever assured of God's grace.

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Can you see the future?

It's a poor sort of memory that only works backwards," says the White Queen to Alice in Lewis Carroll's Alice's Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking-Glass. But, it's not always so, and as many individuals report, missives from the future can make their way into the present, through dreams or intuitions, spanning space and time. However, the burden of foreknowledge can be a heavy one.

Amarjit Bhinder, wife of Air-India co-pilot SS Bhinder of the Kanishka aircraft that crashed in 1985, had a premonition about his death on the day it happened. She revealed in an interview, "I had a dream that I had put his uniform shirts in the machine and it blew off. I felt depressed and ill and took three Disprins to ward off my body ache. At 3 pm, a friend came over and gave me the news...It was uncanny."

Days before the Japan tsunami took place, Canadian psychic medium Blair Robertson sealed his predictions to be opened during a fundraiser. Blair had accurately predicted that a massive earthquake and subsequent tsunami would affect Japan "on Friday or Saturday". Before the September 11, 2001 terrorist attack on the World Trade Center in New York, Hollywood actor Sir Michael Caine dreamed up a similar plot for a book. He told BBC Radio, "I had this plot where terrorists fly a plane into a London skyscraper. Then they did it in real life. I was stunned by that, so I stopped writing."

When Naina (name changed) gained consciousness after an accident, the last thing she remembered was a phone call from her friend and spiritual guru Venugopalan aka Maitreya, "I remember him sounding agitated, telling me to get out of the auto as I was heading for a major accident. But, I didn't pay attention." Says Maitreya, "There is no logical explanation to 'how I know'. It's a connection of the inner and outer spirit. We are all sticklers for plans, but such incidents throw plans out of gear, and teach us to let go, allowing space for transformation and freedom from fear. The idea is to either save the person from the mishap or make them strong enough to bear the aftermath. When it's close family and friends, at times, I start avoiding questions. It can get painful." Even as a child, Maitreya would absorb negative vibes from people, without realising it. He says, "You learn to deal with it, but it's not possible to always keep an emotional distance."

Says tarot reader Scharada Dubey, "It's important for us to ensure the client goes away feeling strengthened, not oppressed. We can't make dire predictions. A clinical approach doesn't help. We have to be compassionate and not project negative feelings as the readings get affected."

Tarot reader Madhu Kotiya has learnt that half-truths can help minimise the trauma of 'bad' news. She was eightyears-old when she told an uncle that his wife was having an affair. It turned out to be true, but her mother forbade her from 'talking like that'. She says, "I, too, tried to resist, as I wanted to live a normal life and didn't want to hear comments about my 'black tongue'. I have learnt to be diplomatic." Madhu admits, "It can be traumatic at times. My most difficult session was a couple of years ago. When this young girl walked in for a session, I could see death around her. She was full of plans for the future, and wanted to know about her impending marriage. It was very difficult for me to keep my calm. She walked out
and two-and-a-half hours later, died in an accident."

Spiritual guru Deepak Chopra, whose book Soulmates touched upon messages from the beyond, prefers to look at the phenomenon from a scientific viewpoint. He says, "It's called non-local communication. It's a real phenomenon but I live my life in the present and don't get distracted by it."

Texas physician Dr Larry Dossey, in his 1989 book Recovering the Soul, introduced the concept of "nonlocal mind" — mind unconfined to the brain and body, mind spread infinitely throughout space and time. He says, "I have come to the opinion that premonitions are our birthright. Our capacity for them is part of our original equipment, something that comes factory installed."

In the book An Experiment with Time, aeronautical engineer John William Dunne tries to make sense of his experiences with vivid dreams which come true with shocking regularity. In the preface to the book, American physicist, author and ESP researcher Russell Targ writes, "In the laboratory, we know that if we show a frightening picture to a person, there will be a significant change in his or her physiology. Their blood pressure, heart rate, and skin resistance will all change. This fight-or-flight reaction is called an 'orienting response'. At the University of Nevada, researcher Dean Radin has shown recently that this orienting response is also observed in a person's physiology a few seconds before they see the scary picture!"

However, predictions can often make for entertaining tidbits. A Toronto-based psychic Nikki, for instance, who predicted the Tiger Woods scandal last year, has several predictions for 2011 — Hollywood actor George Clooney will marry, The Playboy Mansion will burn down after a fire that could start at a party and the US First Lady Michelle Obama could have another baby, maybe twins.

Nawal Gani, who does coffee cup readings, remembers dreaming of a new moon overturned and a broken chair be fore late Prime Minister Rajiv Gandhi passed away. When her mother died, she was at the airport with her sister. Nawal remembers, "In the washroom, I looked at my face in the mirror and wondered why I looked so sad, like I had a terrible loss. I came out to the news that my mother had passed away." She says, "At times, it's tough to separate yourself from clients' problems. I often get rashes or feel extremely agitated in the presence of some people. At times, when I have done aura readings, I have had to be rushed to hospital."

Gopalan Kennedy, astrologer, operates as a 'reporter' and believes in calling a spade a spade. He says, "I knew when my father was dying. Personally, knowing things beforehand helps me a lot. Nothing comes as a shock or a surprise. And it helps me to be well-prepared before the event actually takes place."

Nan Umrigar, author of Sounds of Silence, learnt to communicate with spirits through automatic writing when she lost her young son Karl to an accident. She says, "The spirits don't tell us about future events. However, when people seek help with court cases, divorce or a sick child, help comes in different ways. One has to learn to recognise it. I don't get involved... the decision is not mine to make. It all depends on individual karma. But yes, it has made me more perceptive to signs all around me."

There is also the concept of free will, the fact that one can change future events, and not everything is predestined. Says Joy Dev, who conducts past-life regression sessions, "Awareness of patterns in one's life helps people break out of them. I don't believe in 'good' and 'bad' incidents. If you remove emotions from an incident, there is always a lesson hidden within."

Choreographer Shiamak Davar has often been warned about future events. "All of us have gut instincts but some have them highly developed as they've opened their sub-conscious minds. They have a greater power of knowing what is going to happen. But I still believe in karma and still believe if things have to happen, they will happen. My spiritual mother, Khorshed Bhavnagiri, had often warned me about people and calamities. The most powerful thing one can do is to pray and learn the power of acceptance."

Next time you have a gut instinct, it may be your inner self preparing you for something ahead!

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Taking your diet for granted?

Your health depends a lot on what you eat. Follow a healthy diet — you'll be grateful in the long run.

Anaemia affects thousands of people around the world — some aren't even aware they suffer from it until symptoms become rather severe. The body is composed of White Blood Cells (WBC) and Red Blood Cells (RBC). Anaemia is defined as a decrease in RBC mass. "Red cells carry an important oxygen carrying molecule called haemoglobin. Decreased number of red cells means corresponding lesser amount of haemoglobin available and hence lesser oxygen carried by the blood (red cells) to different parts of the body for nutrition," says Physician Dr Amit Saraf.

 

Interventional Cardiologist Dr Vijay Surase says that iron-deficiency anaemia is the most common form of malnutrition in the world. "Anaemia can be a temporary condition, a consequence of other health conditions or a chronic problem. People with mild anaemia may not have symptoms or have only ones. People with severe anaemia may have problems carrying out routine activities and can feel tired or experience shortness of breath with activity," explains Dr Surase.

Causes
It is caused by nutritional deficiency of iron — blood loss, stomach or intestinal ulcers, worm infestations, excess menstrual loss etc are common reasons. "It is highly prevalent among women of reproductive age because of demands of child-bearing, high fertility rates, and breastfeeding," says Dr Surase.

Treatment
Every cellular function requires oxygen. The brain requires oxygen more than other organs. Lack of oxygen leads to nutritional deficiency to every organ of the body. "Most complaints include lethargy, breathlessness, extreme fatigue, headaches, dizziness, sometimes chest pains and palpitations. Often it is caused by a faulty or inadequate diet, so dietary modifications, which include recommended amounts of veggies and fruits and if permitted non-vegetarian food, should be instituted. Treatment of other causes such as gastric ulcers, certain congenital genetic conditions also forms the mainstay of therapy. Prevention is the best form of treatment. A good diet should prevent anaemia. Include at least two fruits and one portion of green vegetables a day, a non-vegetarian dish once a week and few dry fruits daily. Fruits like oranges, sweet limes, mangoes, apples, pineapples etc are all rich sources of iron," says Dr Saraf.

When you do not have enough healthy red blood cells to carry adequate oxygen to your tissues, it makes you feel very tired. Signs vary according to the type of anaemia. Although they can be mild initially, symptoms tend to worsen over time. Once your doctor has diagnosed you, treatment depends upon the cause. Iron supplements, vitamin and folic acid supplements — oral or as injections are good for iron deficiency, blood loss or malnutrition. In other cases, blood transfusion may also be required. Severe forms require a bone marrow transplant," concludes Dr Parul Sheth.

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Go for your fitness goal

It is very common to start an exercise plan, and then give it up midway due to boredom, lack of time, pressing work deadlines or just sheer laziness.

Tendencies that lead to the abandonment of a healthy lifestyle cause not only weight gain, but also lead to depression, frustration and an acute sense of inadequacy. But adhering to a few simple steps can always help one to maintain an exercise plan or fitness regimen.

Researches have shown that people who exercise first thing in the morning are more likely to adhere to their fitness and diet plans. So it will help to start early to increase motivation levels Exercising with a buddy is also known to help maintain accountability, besides making it harder to shirk that extra set of crunches. If exercise gets boring, it helps to keep oneself distracted with music, television or a magazine.

A zingy playlist of cardio-music is a must. Try mixing up the regimen. Alternate between jogging, aerobics, dance, sports and yoga to make exercising fun. At all times, be realistic and set smaller goals. Set a small target at the start of every week — little successes can play a big role in sustaining motivation levels.

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Antidepressant use linked to thicker arteries

In a study of twin veterans, antidepressant use has been linked to thicker arteries, possibly contributing to the risk of heart disease and stroke.

Depression can heighten the risk for heart disease, but the effect of antidepressant use revealed by the study is separate and independent from depression itself, says first author Amit Shah, a cardiology fellow at Emory University School of Medicine.

The data suggest that antidepressants may combine with depression for a negative effect on blood vessels, he says. Shah is a researcher working with Viola Vaccarino, chair of the Department of Epidemiology at Emory's Rollins School of Public Health.

The study included 513 middle-aged male twins who both served in the U.S. military during the Vietnam War.

Twins are genetically the same but may be different when it comes to other risk factors such as diet, smoking and exercise, so studying them is a good way to distill out the effects of genetics, Shah says.

Researchers measured carotid intima-media thickness - the thickness of the lining of the main arteries in the neck -- by ultrasound. Among the 59 pairs of twins where only one brother took antidepressants, the one taking the drugs tended to have higher carotid intima-media thickness (IMT), even when standard heart disease risk factors were taken into account.

The effect was seen both in twins with or without a previous heart attack or stroke. A higher level of depressive symptoms was associated with higher IMT only in those taking antidepressants.

"One of the strongest and best-studied factors that thickens someone's arteries is age, and that happens at around 10 microns per year," Shah says. "In our study, users of antidepressants see an average 40 micron increase in IMT, so their carotid arteries are in effect four years older."

Antidepressants' effects on blood vessels may come from changes in serotonin, a chemical that helps some brain cells communicate but also functions outside the brain, Shah says.

The most commonly prescribed antidepressants are selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) such as fluoxetine (Prozac), which increase the level of serotonin in the brain. Other types of antidepressants also affect serotonin levels, and antidepressants can act on other multi-functional brain chemicals such as norepinephrine.

In the study, researchers saw higher carotid IMT in both participants who used SSRIs (60 per cent of those who took antidepressants) and those who used other types of antidepressants.

Most of the serotonin in the body is found outside the brain, especially in the intestines, Shah notes. In addition, serotonin is stored by platelets, the cells that promote blood clotting, and is released when they bind to a clot. However, serotonin's effects on blood vessels are complex and act in multiple ways. It can either constrict or relax blood vessels, depending on whether the vessels are damaged or not.

"I think we have to keep an open mind about the effects of antidepressants on neurochemicals like serotonin in places outside the brain, such as the vasculature. The body often compensates over time for drugs'' immediate effects," Shah says.

"Antidepressants have a clinical benefit that has been established, so nobody taking these medications should stop based only on these results. This isn't the kind of study where we can know cause and effect, let alone mechanism, and we need to see whether this holds up in other population groups."

The data is being presented Tuesday, April 5 at the American College of Cardiology meeting in New Orleans.

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This Thai temple offers funerals for pets

An orange-robed monk chanted as a teary-eyed, black-clad family prayed quietly in front of a crematorium. A normal Buddhist funeral service in Thailand except for one thing -- the deceased was canine.

Bereaved pet lovers in Bangkok come to Klong Toey Nai temple by the Chao Phraya river to mark the passing of their animal friends with full funeral rites which begin with short prayers by monks, a two-hour cremation, and a trip down the river to spread the ashes. "She is part of our family. In life, we took her to a grooming salon and a swimming pool. In death, we want to give her the best too," said Jiraporn Wongwanna, 35, who just lost her 14-year-old terrier-poodle mix, Bai Toey, to liver failure.

"In a crowded capital of 15 million people with few owning enough land for burial, many people are opting for cremation for their departed pets", said Sampao Yampradit, a 79-year-old animal lover and undertaker who has performed the service for pets for more than 7 years.

The temple started to cremate stray dogs and cats nearly a decade ago, before they began offering funeral services for pets. Now they perform five to 15 funerals a day. While most are dogs and cats, the pets have included turtles, fish, rabbits and monkeys.

"It's a Buddhist belief that cremation sends you forward into the next life while a burial might not do that," Sampao said, dropping chips of fragrant wood and flowers into the incinerator. Jiraporn, her father, and two cousins attended the ceremony, watching Bai Toey's furry body gently pushed into the pyre.

The cost of a cremation is 1,800 baht ($60), including the boat service to spread the ashes. Cremation of dogs heavier than 20 kg (44 lb) costs 2,000 baht and those who want a gold-plated wooden coffin will have to pay another 3,000 baht. "People are willing to pay for it. It's a good way to say goodbye," Sampao said. The temple in the capital, which has an estimated 800,000 or more homeless dogs, also offers free services for those who bring in strays but cannot afford to pay.

The monk chanted, asking Jiraporn and her family to repeat after him: "This life cycle is completed. We pray that Bai Toey be born in the next life blessed with prosperity and good health, in a better form, like one of a human."

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5 People you should avoid dating at work

Things really can go wrong when you become romantically involved with someone at your workplace – and what matters the most is who you're dating.

A new Vault survey of more than 2,000 workers found that of those who have had an office fling or romance (59 per cent), 30 per cent said it affected their personal or professional relationships with other co-workers.

Eighteen per cent said their workplace dalliance led them or their romantic partner to leave the company.

According to ABC News , here's a list of five people you should never date to avoid becoming one of these workplace-dating casualties.

1. The Intern
So much can go wrong when dating an intern, assistant or any other underling that such temptations are best left alone. If your colleagues find out about this office romance, there could be cries of favouritism.

2. The IT guy or gal
Nothing beats having your request for computer assistance rise to the top of the tech support queue. But fall out of favour with your technically inclined valentine and you'll have to endure the tech support call of shame any time your computer has the hiccups.

3. The boss
Throw sex, unrequited love and/or an ugly break-up into the mix and there's no telling how far your professional reputation could plummet.

4. The boss's spouse
Sleeping with a married co-worker is never a good idea. But sleeping with the boss's significant other is nothing short of career suicide.

5. The serial dater
Cozy up to the office philanderer and you make yourself a prime target for professional gossip and hostility. Not only can your reputation plummet overnight, your colleagues may have a hard time taking you seriously.

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Mum's happiness more important to children

A new UK study has found that a mother's happiness in her partnership is more important to the child than the father's.

The findings are based on a sample of 6,441 women, 5,384 men and 1,268 young people.

The Understanding Society research examined the relationships between married or cohabiting partners, and relationships between parents and their children.

Overall, 60 per cent of young people said they were ''completely satisfied'' with their family situation but in families where the child's mother is unhappy in her partnership, only 55 per cent of young people said they were ''completely happy'' with their family situation – compared with 73 per cent of young people whose mothers are ''perfectly happy'' in their relationships.

Prof John Ermisch, Maria Iacovou, and Alexandra Skew from the Institute for Social and Economic Research found that the happiest children are those living with two parents – either biological or step – with no younger siblings, who do not quarrel with their parents regularly, who eat at least three evening meals per week with their family and whose mother is happy in her own relationship.

"At a time when there is widespread political concern about ''Broken Britain'', these findings show that family relationships and the happiness of parents are key to the happiness of young people," said Iacovou.

"Contrary to the popular belief that children only want to spend time playing videogames or watching TV we found that they were most happy when interacting with their parents or siblings," she added.

The research also found that having older siblings was not related to children's happiness with their family, but having younger siblings in the household is associated with lower levels of satisfaction.

But relationships with parents are even more important than relationships with siblings.

Only 28 per cent of children who quarrel more than once a week with their parents, and don't discuss important matters with their parents are completely happy with their families.

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A bit of Spousonomics!

Marriage is a religious, social and legal union of two individuals till death do them part. But in the last decade, India has witnessed a steep increase in the number of divorces. Spousonomics, enabling couples to economise their time and efforts, can help.

In the book Spousonomics, authors Jenny Anderson and Paula Szuchman write that the most important things in a successful marriage are faithfulness and sharing household chores like laundry, dishes and cleaning.

Rajesh Raman has been married for five years now. He and his spouse Garima come from different cultures and traditions. Says Raman, "Before marriage, I never celebrated Holi. But now, it has become the most awaited celebration." He adds, "We complement each other well. The qualities that I lack — time management, planning for future goals, etc — are compensated by my spouse. I make up for her being short on patience. "

Many times, the financial position stated by the groom or bride before marriage is contrary to the truth and leads to strained relationships, says Dr Shailaja Pokhriyal, consultant, clinical psychology, Dr B L Kapur Memorial Hospital, New Delhi.

There can also be issues related to allocation of different resources and on how to bring up the child. Hence, for a lasting relationship, one should be accommodative and open to communication.

Tips for a happy marriage   
Division of labour
As an individual, we might be good in certain areas. For example, some people are better at cooking, while others panic at the sight of a vacuum cleaner.

Incentives
Get your spouse to do what you want by giving him/her an incentive of his or her choice.

The principle of cost and benefit
Both partners should understand the cost and benefit of an argument. Communicating with each other is the key to all successful relationships. It reduces the possibilities of misunderstandings.

(Inputs by Dr Rachna K Singh, lifestyle management expert, Artemis Health Institute, Gurgaon )

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