Grooving at the gym

If you're in a gym, chances are you'll be pumping iron while listening to music, perhaps even from a DJ! While some experts feel pulsating music can motivate you for a workout, others feel it is a distraction and takes the focus away from exercise. Shelly Mahajan, a fitness freak, hits the gym every day in the morning with groggy eyes, but the music helps her to get into the momentum.

Music is an essential part of a gym and with a growing demand, most gyms these days have live DJ sessions or international music to make the workout a fun session. Nicholas Kraal, business development manager of a fitness firm, says music is a great motivator. "We have a dedicated DJ booth and professional DJs spin music from 6 am to midnight. Equipped with the latest collection of music, our DJs also take music requests and play fun, fast-paced, pumping music to motivate and excite our members during workout sessions," said Kraal.

"Certain classes require specialised music based on beats. Aerobic instructors use music to keep the 32-count (32-beats per minute) or 120 beat per minute. A high impact class can even have anything between 130-140 beats per minute," said Althea Shah, general manager (operations) and fitness expert at a popular gym. "There are aerobic songs for every decade, pretty much from the 1940s through the 1990s. Classes sometimes cater not by age but by musical taste with beach, jazz, hip-hop, Latin, classic rock, country, Broadway, classical, club, and disco aerobic music," he added. Shah also points out that the reception area, spa and changing rooms have soft music playing while the workout area has fast-paced music.

Some people prefer listening to their own collection while gymming and Amit Nigam is one of them — he prefers to bring in his own iPod for a workout. "There are times when you get bored of the same beats or music and if you love a particular music genre, listening to another one can be torturous," he said.

And there are a few who like to watch TV while working out and Kraal says it is a matter of personal choice.

"Watching TV or listening to personal music while working out is a personal choice and we respect that. Some members may find it more motivating to listen to a personal play list while others prefer TV as it helps them to take their mind off the physical exertion," he said. "The iPod can be clipped on to your arm or T-shirt. It is tiny and so can be totally forgotten and you can workout without worrying about your headphones being dragged from your ears every 30 seconds," he added.

But there are some who don't like any distractions while gymming. Personal trainer Aashu, who has been in the profession for over 14 years, prefers to train without music or television and doesn't agree with the 'music motivational' theory. "Listening to music or watching TV is just a way of getting distracted and not giving 100 percent to your workout and this affects results," he said. What happens when you are listening to your favourite music? Half your mind is enjoying it, and the other half is trying to get the posture right — so the focus that one requires in a workout is not there. People believe music motivates them, but does it actually? "Why does one need music to motivate one for a workout? This is a clear indication that they are not enjoying their workout and doing it just for the sake of it. They need to change their workout, not music," he added.

Another fitness expert, Tasneem Zaki, also agrees with Aashu. "I believe when you are doing cardio, it is good to listen to music because it helps to distract attention from the speedometer. But if you are doing weight-training, free-hand exercises or floor exercises, it's always better to switch off the music," he said.

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Eating pretty

Your fridge can rescue you from far more than just mid night hunger pangs. Many swear by the latest hydrating 100 per cent organic under eye fruit pulp extract instead of taking a closer look at what they eat.

Here are a few secrets food kingdom withholds that can help you with your skin and tresses much more than any evergreen forest-containing cosmetic you can splurge on. Don't undermine the dramatic impact underrated fruits and vegetables can have on your struggles with hair loss, patchy skin, dull hair or even pale eyes. Here is a cheat sheet on a food guide to looking good.

Eggs
Not only are these easy quick no-brainers when you're starving, they are also great sources of protein and iron both of which aid strong hair growth. They are also high in sulfur which helps to keep hair soft and smooth. Feel free to eat it any way you please, boiled, fried, baked or directly applied on your hair. You might have to make an effort to get rid of the smell later.

Bananas
The beauty of the banana lies in its ability to keep your skin supple and elastic. The skin loses elasticity as it ages, and the potassium in bananas greatly help restore it. Eat like the monkeys do, or devour it as a split with ice cream, chocolate sauce and nuts.

Red cabbage
Not only is it a fancy looking addition to your salad, this purple cousin of our humble green cabbage is packed with sulfur and iodine. These help in detoxifying the body which has an almost immediate impact on your skin, leaving it with a glow. It's also a great cure for acne.

Guava
Rich in antioxidants, these counteract free radicals that are often accused of skin damage that leaves you looking old. If you don't fancy eating them, just rub a slice over your skin and wash off after a while. Interestingly, it's concentration of Vitamin C beats other citrus fruits. Fantastic eaten fresh, raw and with a squeeze of lime.

Lentils
Beans and legumes are surprising great nourishment for hair. Kidney beans, dals, chick peas form an essential troupe of your hair care package. Plenty proteins help growth while iron, zinc and biotin help keep hair strong and give it a sheen. A bowl or two with your meals a day should suffice.

Beets
Clearly not a very beloved member of the food family, these purple pods contain betaine, a bioactive agent that help break down fat. Their juice contains a form of chlorine that aids digestion. Add a spoon or two of beet juice to your gravy or salad dressing if eating as a whole is too much. Boiled and salted is a simple but delicious version as well.

Spinach
The sailor didn't love it for nothing. The age-old tale of green fruits and vegetables, and they usually mean the commonly found spinach, is good for more than just iron. They are rich in caroteniods, lutein and zeaxanthin which are great for keeping the white of your eyes clear especially if you regularly suffer from eye infections. Spinach is a great accompaniment to meats and can be had as is in the form of salads or a quick fry vegetable with a dash of chilli and garlic.

Citrus fruits
It's a known fact that citrus fruits are a useful source of Vitamin C. Vitamin C works synergistically with sources of Iron to allow better absorption of Iron and plays a huge part in the creation of collagen, an essential component of hair growth.

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Tomatoes can save you from high cholesterol

Want to be free of high cholesterol and blood pressure (BP)? Tomatoes can be a way out for you!

Tomatoes may be an effective alternative to drugs in lowering cholesterol and BP and in preventing heart disease.

A bright red pigment called lycopene found in tomatoes and to a lesser extent in watermelon, guava, papaya and pink grapefruit has antioxidant properties that are vital to good health.

Karin Ried and her colleague Peter Fakler from the University of Adelaide are the first to summarise the effect of lycopene on cholesterol and blood pressure (BP), analysing the collective results of 14 studies over the last 55 years.

"Our study suggests that if more than 25 milligrams of lycopene is taken daily, it can reduce LPD (bad) cholesterol by up to 10 per cent," says Ried, reports the journal Maturitas.

Tomatoes have high levels of lycopene, with half a litre of tomato juice taken daily, or 50 grams of tomato paste, providing protection against heart disease, according to an Adelaide statement.

"That's comparable to the effect of low doses of medication commonly prescribed for people with slightly elevated cholesterol, but without the side effects of these drugs, which can include muscle pain and weakness and nerve damage," says Ried.

Lycopene is better absorbed in processed and cooked tomatoes or tomato paste rather than fresh tomatoes. As a supplement, lycopene is available in soft gelatine capsules or tablets.

"Research shows that high lycopene consumption has been associated with a decreased risk of cardiovascular disease, including hardened arteries, heart attacks and strokes," she adds.

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First kiss matters more than losing virginity

Be it behind the bike sheds or at the school disco, you are more likely to remember your first romantic kiss with your partner than even loosing your virginity.

Scientists have claimed that most of us can recall 90 per cent of the details of the experience—a memory more vivid than losing their virginity, reports the Daily Mail .

But, the art is so complex that scientist Sheril Kirshenbaum has written a book about it.

In 'The Science of Kissing: What Our Lips Are Telling Us', Kirshenbaum writes that men see kissing "as a means to an end" and possibly with a "view to swapping other bodily fluids later",

Women try to "extricate the significance of a relationship based on a single kiss and often that leads to miscommunication."

Men are more aggressive kissers, as they are trying to pass on a "testosterone bomb" to a lover.

However, testosterone passed on during sessions of smaller but frequent kisses stays in the body longer, and can push a woman to falling in love more quickly.

The author, a researcher at the University of Texas, measured the magnetic current in brains of men and women in response to images of people kissing.

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Perfect girlfriend has a big sex drive!

Men believe that the perfect girlfriend is the one who has a high sex drive, enjoys a hearty meal and gets ready to go out in 10 minutes.

Apart from this, the perfect girlfriend is a career-minded woman who earns more than their partner but at the same time wants to stay at home and bring up the children.

The clue to these seemingly contradictory demands lies in the men polled, 3,000 bachelors.

Near the top of their girlfriend checklist is the requirement that she should have a "pert bottom" – which may explain why they are still single.

And while three-quarters of the men polled said their ideal woman would keep her weight in check, 89 per cent also wanted her to tuck into a big meal without worrying. These perfect ladies will have luscious long hair, be skinny and trim and confident enough to go out without make-up.

"While many women might find these standards hard to live up to, six in 10 men firmly believe their perfect girlfriend is out there somewhere. However, there are a few contradictions which might make it hard for them to get their ideal date," the Daily Express quoted Nicole Clowes, spokeswoman for UKDating , which carried out the poll, as saying.

"There aren't many women who can tuck into a mountain of food every day and stay skinny. And there is some confusion about whether men would like to date a high earner or someone who stays at home with the children."

The ability to hold an intelligent conversation isn't a big concern for men – 61 per cent prefer someone who likes a laugh and a joke.

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Things to do before finding your man

Madhuri Banerjee, author of the book Losing My Virginity and Other Dumb Ideas, lists the top 10 things a girl should do before she finds a man

Date blindly
Go on an online dating site and register yourself. Blind dates are fun. They are a great reminder to why you waited. You don't need to lose your virginity to any of those men. Ask your friends to fix you up with people. The more you're out there with different folks, the more your confidence increases. When the time comes to lose your virginity, you will know it is for the right reason with the right man. Invest in variety and choose wisely.

Travel wisely
Be it alone or with your girlfriends, travel to a place you've never been to, but always desired to visit. Let the place be tourist friendly, safe, and filled with men who can speak your language and find you `exotic'. There's nothing like a foreign man who has a crush on you to make you feel divine. A good book or the photos, which you've taken, will make for good conversation starters.

Fall madly
Try an adventure sport like bungee jumping or river rafting. The scare and the confidence later will help when it's time to lose your virginity. Nothing could be that bad, that exhilarating, or that memorable. The big moment becomes a piece of cake!

Shop profusely
Don't go off and buy things that you "need" and things that are "useful" like towels and soap dispensers. You need to go shopping for that sexy lingerie, satin nighties, plunging dresses, and high heels. To get into the correct mood, you need to feel it. Every day. Wear the lingerie at night, even if you have no one in your life. Strut around in your dresses and heels in the day. You need to feel sexy. Once you know you're in the groove, things will be effortless.

House sensibly
You need to stay with a roommate or alone. You need to come home to a painting you bought and hung up, to a cook who has made food that you craved for and not to a mother who asks how your day was. While parents are perfectly fine as caregivers, they're not going to approve of you losing your virginity. Moreover, if you plan to do it in their house, it becomes even shadier. Is that what you really want to remember, because you will remember it! Advice: If you build it, it will happen.

Converse sexily
Memorising the morning papers, surfing the net for quantum physics and speaking the language of the geek is not going to help. While you might love to be an intellectual person, understand the nuances of the superficial topics as well. Conversation might not always be about nano technology and you need to be prepared for a lighter question like "Were you scared while watching Ragini MMS?" Instead of "Is Apple finlly ending the dominance of Microsoft ?"

Be hygeinic regularly
Get your teeth done. Check for fresh breath. Most of the time, people forget basic things in life. If you smoke, or do not floss regularly, it is best to get your teeth a makeover. Shiny white teeth are a turn on. Bathing regularly and wearing fresh clothes are 'bare' necessities.

Turn on body language
Stand up straight, tummy in, feel taller. If you're going to slouch and run around looking sweaty, you're not going to get laid anytime soon. Learn how to make eye contact, toss your hair, twirl the curls, perfect the softest smile, and cross your legs demurely. Now not all this will probably lead to the exact moment, but if you're interested in a person, it might help in the future.

Gaze besottedly
Learn to switch off from alternative lives (read: social networks) and have meaningful conversations with the person in front of you. If you don't know how to laugh at another person's joke without looking at your mobile, or secretly pray the evening will end so you can upload the photo of yourself on Facebook, you are in serious trouble. It is the age of technology but a human being in front of you who is interested in you is a rare find. That person has taken time out to spend it with you and if both of you are on a mobile, it would be better if you went home and "bbm'd" him. Harvard psychologist Zick Rubin began recording the amount of time lovers spent staring at each other and discovered that those deeply in love look at each other 75 per cent of the time when talking and are slower to look away when someone else intrudes. Learning to look at someone instead of being distracted helps in connecting with another person. Tweet another day!

Speak positively
You need to be a positive person first. Look at life with rose-tinted glasses instead of those sharp, hornrimmed, sceptical ones. Stop being critical, gossipy and cantankerous. Instead, be more bright, bubbly and cheerful. Being a whiner about your stress issues is not going to help bring in the man or get him turned on. People like being around happy people. Positive is sexy.

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Safety on the field

 The benefits of sports are many and undeniable but then, one can sustain injuries while practising a sport. Injuries can be serious and even fatal at times. So, just follow these basic rules to safeguard your child from these risks.

Get a check-up done:
Before your kid starts to play games, get a thorough check-up done. Make sure that your child does not suffer from any ailment like asthma or osteoporosis. And if he/she does, then it should be controlled and only then should they be sent to the field.

Sports gear:
Getting the right equipment is essential. It is important that you get proper sports kits and safety gears. Pads and shoes should be of the exact size. Regularly check the sports gear for any wear and tear, and if there is any, replace or mend it. If your child is a swimmer or plays a sport that exposes them to sunlight, then a sunblock or a sunscreen should be applied to protect them from sunburns.

Keep Them hydrated:
Sports make children susceptible to heatstrokes and dehydration. So, it is necessary that kids consume an adequate amount of water. They can also have energy drinks and juices.

The right place to play:
Check whether the place where your kids are going to play is appropriate for that sport or not. The field should be devoid of any potholes and should also be hygienic.

Supervision:
Check whether there is a coach to supervise the kids or not. Better still if the person knows a little about first aid and CPR.

Birds of feather:
Your kids should play with children in their own age group. This will help decrease accidents and also keep them safe from getting bullied by seniors.

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Be lady-like to succeed at work

Here's a suggestion for women who want to succeed at work – try resisting the temptation to act like men, suggest researchers.

Their studies show that women who take an aggressive approach are often less likely to get ahead than those who exhibit more feminine traits.

If however, they try to conform, promotion comes their way, the research from George Mason University in Virginia found.

The findings, which will dismay feminists, suggest the best way for a woman to succeed in a man's world is to act like a lady, reports the Daily Mail .

They tally with past research that showed women oozing with self-confidence, assertiveness and other characteristics linked with successful management can be side-lined at work in favour of meeker types.

It is thought that while such traits are highly-prized in men, go-getting women are penalised for not being feminine enough and are seen as less likeable.

The study appears in a journal published by the British Psychological Society .

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Dogs can recognize their owners' faces

 A new study has shown that dogs rely on seeing their owners' faces in order to recognise them.

The researchers also measured how much dogs prefer to gaze at and follow their owners, rather than a stranger.

The team described how dogs had difficultly recognising their human "best friend" when the person had their face covered.

The study sheds more light on how thousands of years of domestication have affected the behaviour of canines.

Paolo Mongillo from the University of Padua said that, although many researchers have studied how dogs interact with humans, no one had yet investigated how the animals focused on one person in preference to another - or just how much companion dogs "prefer" their owners.

"We had the dog in an empty room and we instructed the owner and another person - someone unfamiliar to the dog - to walk across the room several times," the BBC quoted Mongillo, lead author of the study as saying.

"The people walked in opposite directions, so they crossed many times in front of the dog and we measured how long the dog looked at one person versus another," he said.

The research team then instructed the two people to leave the room via two different doors and allowed the dog to approach one of the doors.

"Most of the dogs gazed at their owners for most of the time and then chose to wait by the owner's door," said Mongillo.

In the second part of the study, the scientists asked the people to cover their faces; the human volunteers then walked across the room with bags over their heads.

During this phase of the experiment, the dogs were much less attentive to their owners. This revealed just how much the animals relied on human faces for recognition.

Wild dogs rely on body signals and on cues from other animals in their social groups, but studies including this one suggest that domestic dogs are so attuned to human social groups that they are even able to recognise some human facial expressions.

"This is very likely to be a by-product of thousands of years of domestication," said Mongillo.
In the same study, the team investigated the effects of ageing on the dogs' attention.

They found that "aged" dogs - seven years and older - were less able to focus on their owner and also were less likely to choose the owner's door.

The findings appeared in the journal Animal Behaviour.

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Why Alpha men keep on having affairs?

Why are today's men having an affair at the back of their wives, fiancee or girlfriends?

According to one of the world's best-selling psychologists, powerful men have higher than average levels of testosterone, which they seek to 'top up' when their reserves become depleted. One way they do that is to have an affair

Dr John Gray, who has sold 50 million copies of 'Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus', has claimed that the gulfs in understanding that divide men from women are being exacerbated by hormones, which are working against people achieving monogamy in a stressful world.

"Why are the sexes not getting along? It's just that people have new needs and they don't know what to do about them; they want passion but don't know how to sustain it," the Guardian quoted him as telling the Observer.

According to Gray, recent scandals show high-fliers use flings to top up on testosterone.

He said long-term relationships generate oxytocin, dubbed the 'love hormone', which encourages bonding between couples and helps to lower female stress levels. But that benefit comes at a price for alpha male partners.

"With oxytocin and alpha men, as the women's stress level goes down when she gets oxytocin from a loving monogamous relationship, the man's testosterone level is going down, so he's getting more stressed and more inclined to seek out risky behaviour to push it back up again. The concept is that intimacy can lower a man's sexual drive," he added.

He believes that is why men are driven to risky affairs, and why women will no longer tolerate it.

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Flirt, but don't be sexually offensive

There's a big difference between being flirtatious and being sexually offensive. Our experts explore that distinction and tell you where to draw that line.

France's top presidential candidate and head of the International Monetary Fund, Dominique Strauss-Kahn infamously headlined global news as he was arrested on charges of attacking and attempting to rape a New York hotel maid. While the verdict is still out on whether Kahn is a sexual predator or a victim of dirty politics, the incident has thrown up discussions on whether some people just can't tell if something is merely flirtatious or downright offensive. Our experts negotiate the line that divides the two.

Flirting involves teasing by speaking or behaving in a playful way that suggests more intimacy than is. Since usually both parties enjoy the attention, generous compliments fly around and nothing seems offensive.

However, it's not unusual to hear of playful banter getting replaced by a strong sense of power play or the desire to exercise control over another. This is where decorum is lost and the act becomes sexually offensive. People engage in consensual flirting as helps boost one's self esteem. Sexual harassment, on the other hand, is a degrading.

Walking the line
Psychiatrist Dr Harish Shetty says a good way to identify a potential assaulter is to keep a look out for some key indicators. He will tend to use a lot of suggestive language and pass remarks loaded with sexual double entendres. "The trick is to see through them as early as you can. At times, people mask their intentions with subtle patronising behaviour and frequently make excuses to meet up. Lines like — 'My wife/girlfriend is so boring, it is such fun talking to you' or 'Let me drop you home' or 'I'll always be there for you' — smack of typical patronising moves that one should be wary of. Unlike flirting, these talks are usually coupled with inappropriate body language such as excessive touching that buzzes with signs of trouble," Shetty explains. The playful touching that accompanies flirting is also a far cry from the indecent touching that occurs, leaving the victim violated.

Men and women in positions of power are most likely to slip due to impulsiveness or a momentary lapse of reason, Shetty adds. Former Punjab Police chief K P S Gill's misbehaviour episode is a case in point. Shetty attributes Gill's folly to his error in judgement. In a 1988 party, Gill landed in trouble by 'patting the posterior' of senior IAS officer Rupan Deol. Eventually, the Supreme Court penalised Gill and upheld his conviction of being put on one year probation.

Shetty says in instances of higherups sexually harassing a subordinate or someone below them — as is purported in Kahn's case — a sense of omnipotence and power is at play. "The mindset of such a person is of him or her being the boss and capitalising on the easy accessibility of the victim, who may not complain or make a racket over it."

Office antics
In an office space, sexual harassment could range from objectionable references to body parts and clothing to even a stray compliment, says Human Resources consultant Shishir Dave. "Harmless banter among colleagues is fine. But flirting becomes one on one instantly acquires a sexual overtone making it unacceptable in an office space. A certain unsaid, professional decorum is expected in offices."

Often people blurt out crude remarks impulsively without realising their implications. This is when HR personnel try and sensitise employees. Continuous bad behaviour usually has them transfered out. "But if they are incorrigible, they will be served with a memo and if there is physical abuse involved, they will be shown the door. In call centres, where most of the employees are young and fresh out of college, we make it a point to draw a line straightaway as the general attitude is very nonchalant and laidback. We tell them that the boss will be friendly to them but will not be their friend."

So the best way to keep out of crossing the line would be to read the person you are flirting with and taking a no for a no. After all, flirting is best when intimacy is kept at a safe distance.

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